We've been on a little bit of a roller coaster today. Harper is totally off of her meds and IV's but she started having some withdrawl from her pain meds. Our doctor warned us a week ago when this happened she would be irritable. Well - he was right and she's had a tough day. She was pretty mad most of the day. Mommy holding her seemed to help a lot but she would still get upset. She also has been breathing a little hard so they had to put a tube in her nose to feed her. She is getting my milk so that's the good thing - it's just hard to go from bottles or nursing back to a tube. The grandparents are all back and this was them watching from the window while we held her. I had a small breakdown this morning because I'm just SO scared to take her home where I won't have monitors to watch her heart rate or breathing and I just keep thinking "what if something happens?" I was terrified when I was pregnant thinking about being in charge of a little life but now that she's been sick - it's even scarier. But it's all about the TRUST in God I've been talking about. I had to remind myself that the God who did a miracle and gave me her in the first place and then did another miracle and healed her is the same God who will help me watch over her night and day. Harper likes me to sing to her (even if my singing is bad) and all day I've been singing "Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus". I need to hear that last line over and over - "Oh for grace to trust Him more!" Our sweet friends - Brad, Amanda and Neely came to visit today. I felt so bad because we were in the midst of a major change when they came so we didn't get to visit much. Neely and Harper will be fast friends in the future I just know! Thank ya'll SO much for coming!!!! Our big change was this afternoon - a doctor came out and said they had a private room open in the children's hospital and since Harper was doing well (and since our whole family was there in the NICU all day long) - they were going to move Harper there. I was so nervous at first because I was scared to leave the good care of the NICU and I wasn't sure how this would work but I have to tell you - we are so excited. The children's hospital is new and SO nice. We now have this HUGE room with a flat screen TV and chairs and a couch and a place to keep our stuff and our own bathroom and we can be in the same room with Harper all day long. We can hold her and dress her up and change her as much as we want. And this will help us transition into going home. We still aren't sure when that will be. We got excited and thought it could be in a few days but it may be a couple of weeks instead. I'm totally good with that - I just want her to be 100% healthy when we take her home.
I think we have several visitors coming tomorrow so it should be a busy day! I'm going to get to stay with Harper at night now. Thank for continuing to pray for us! You have all blessed our lives so much!