Harper turns six this week. SIX. Why does that seem so old? For those of you who began reading here when she was born, it's a little nuts that you have stuck around for six whole years with our family. I'm so glad you have. But wow - those six years went by fast!
I posted this on Instagram (which I find myself posting on instagram and then not blogging) but she asked me one day last week if she was going to have to wear her hearing aids until she was grown up. And then she said "I don't want to". It's the first time she has really ever said anything negative about her hearing aids.
And my heart just sank.
Because not only do I know she will always wear them but I know she could also possibly lose all of her hearing in the near future. We haven't discussed with her because it's not 100% and I just don't think she needs to know yet. And as positive as I am about the whole situation, my momma heart hurts when I realize there may come a time she will get up at night and come to my bed (which happens often) and she won't be able to hear me speak back.
So I just nodded my head to her with a lump in my throat and said "yes, Baby, you always will have them." But then I followed up with "but God choose you special and it's not going to stop you from doing anything you want to do. He has big plans for you Harper".
Just like He has big plans for ALL of our kids!
We always sing this song in church and I tear up every time thinking of how God knew when I was pregnant six years ago with her that her birth would be rough and that she would lose her hearing. But He's got this! I don't HAVE to be in control because HE IS!
I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Before even time began
My life was in His hands.
He knows my name.......
I frequently get emails from moms who are just starting on this journey. Their kids have just been diagnosed with hearing loss and they are worried. They are worried how they will do in school and how their speech will be. They have every thought that I had four years ago. And even though we are still very near the start on this journey and I don't know much - if I'm a few steps ahead I LOVE to be able to say "I promise - it's going to be okay!" I love to say "you won't believe this now but when he's five, he will put his hearing aids in by himself and even ask for them". She may not speak clearly at all now but after a few years of speech (even if her hearing is declining) her therapist may say " I think she may graduate out soon". He will read boks in kindergarten and be right there at the top of her class and have a dozen friends.
We all need encouragment and if I can offer just a little to a mom in my shoes - it makes my day! So please always email me or send your friends to me if they need an ear to listen!
We will hopefully go back to the audiologist in the next couple of months and see where we are at. We are taking this one step at a time and thankfully 99% of our steps are forward steps! I'm so thankful for this almost six year old.