Monday, January 09, 2012

Dream big

 I'm sorry if I talk about Harper's hearing a lot on here. But right now - it's just a big part of our lives. So really - I'm not sorry.  It's a journey we are on so it's natural for me to think about it a lot.  It's something that 80% of the time I don't think about or worry about it and then about 20% of the time I'm consumed with worry and sadness.  I try to have a positive attitude and I just go on with everything like we have absolutely no issues.
Harper has been begging to go to "dance class" every since the last time we went (and it was a disaster).  She is constantly dancing around. So today I took her to a younger class at the same studio.
 She woke up from nap right before we went so when I went to put her "ears" in - she cried her eyes out. She did NOT want to wear them to dance class. And I wanted to burst into tears too. As she grows - she won't want to wear them to new experiences because of what people will think.  It's a feeling I just hate. And for the first few minutes of her class - she stood frozen. She wasn't herself at all and I could tell she felt overwhelmed by something new and possibly not hearing 100% was affecting her.
And I ACHED for her. And I sat with tears in my eyes worrying about all the things she will face in life.
But then she put on her tap shoes and she came to life. And suddenly she was just like every other little girl in the room. And she did great! And I realized she is going to be okay. I want her to take dance so she can get practice following directions and exercise and get confidence.  I just want her to know she can dream big. Don't we all want that for our little girls?
I'm a huge Miss America fan. I have been all my life. And one of my favorites won in 1995 - Heather Whitestone. I will always remember her dancing to "via delarosa".  And she was deaf.  Thinking about her inspires me now.  I also saw a clip on GMA over the holidays of a girl who is almost deaf who is an NFL cheerleader.  I watched with tears in my eyes and knew Harper was going to be okay. I don't know if I want her to be Miss America or a cheerleader. Maybe she will be good at math. Or a teacher. Or a doctor. Or a famous singer. Or maybe she will use her talents as a wife and mom.  But I know whatever she does - God is already preparing her. And He works all things together for the good! (Romans 8:28)

And just because she is cute - I had to add a few pictures of little sister into the post.  She did great at Dance Class - just sitting and watching the big girls. She was mesmerized. One day I will have two little ballerinas. Or maybe one soccer player and one dancer. Who knows?
No matter what either of these girls do - I will always be so proud to be their mom! Nothing can ever change my love for them! They are mine!

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