Monday, July 28, 2008

The Waiting Game

Being pregnant has been just the most wonderful thing in the world. I wake up and the first thing I think every morning is "I'm having a BABY". I can't quit smiling. I have never been more happy in my life. Every day I spend time thanking God for this wonderful, wonderful blessing.

But at the same time - I have been SO burdened because I know there are so many of you out there who are still waiting and are still feeling hopeless and I know how that feels and I don't want anyone to have to experience that. I want everyone to feel as happy as I am today. There were so many dark days where I just never really thought I would ever end up pregnant or that I would ever be this happy. I know how it feels to go to a baby shower or church or even Wal-Mart and feel like everyone but you has a baby belly or a little child with them and it's so lonely. I understand how you can feel sometimes like God just must not be hearing you.

I just want to offer some encouragement to those of you who are waiting. I have heard so many miraculous stories lately and it has encouraged me to spend more and more time earnestly praying for women who want to be moms. I believe with all my heart that God has a plan for each of you.

I get a lot of e-mails from all of you who read my blog and a lot from women who don't have blogs. I received two e-mails in the last few days that just thrilled me. One was from a girl who has been trying for over 4 years to get pregnant. They have tried EVERYTHING including IVF - even using donor eggs. I mean they have done EVERYTHING. And recently they went on vacation and she started feeling sick and you guessed it - she is pregnant. ON THEIR OWN! And another girl e-mailed me to share her story of how they couldn't get pregnant so they finally adopted earlier this year and then soon after discovered they were pregnant and she is due with their second child in a few months! NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD! I want so badly for all of you to believe that.

I have heard from moms who adopted and said even though that is not what they had planned - they wouldn't change a thing because they couldn't imagine life without their child now. That gave me so much encouragement for those of you who might be led to adopt.



The whole time we suffered with infertility - I listened to this song above over and over. I had to get to the point where I could sing those words and believe them in my heart. I had to be able to praise God even if He wasn't blessing me right at that moment. I had to praise Him in the hard times. We sang this yesterday in church and it takes my breath away because God truly is Good. He is the same God and loves us the same - whether He gives us what we think we want or need or not. He has perfect timing. He is not a "fair" God - but he is a Holy and Just God.
I'm praying that God gives you the same joy I have now and soon!

P.S. Speaking of joy - Sunni has some great news today! I'm ready to drive to Dallas so I can eat burritos with her and Amanda. It seems our babies love mexican food!

P.P.S. There is a friend of a blogger friend who has suffered infertility and is now 22 weeks pregnant and just went into labor. Can you please lift her up in prayer? You can read the details here or visit her blog and leave her a comment to let her know you are praying. Thank you!

34 comments:

J.L. said...

Love your blog, Kelly. You are such an inspiration to women everywhere about hope and how everything is in God's perfect timing! I hope you won't mind me adding your site to my blog - I visit ya just about everyday! Stop in and see me sometime... Take care!

Jenny said...

What a great post. God has blessed us with two precious boys, but we also have had to walk through heartache as we experienced three miscarriages. I too loved to sing this song. Especially the last part about giving and taking away...my heart will choose to say "Blessed be your name!"
We are now adopting and know without a doubt that this is exactly where God has called us. He truly is good and His timing is always perfect!

Anonymous said...

Kelly,
I felt the same way you are feeling when we finally found out we were pregnant (with twins-10 years ago.) We had gone through 4 years of infertility and I was so scared we would NEVER have kids. I wanted to be pregnant so badly.

When it finally happened, I was the happiest I have ever been in my whole life..(it gets even better when you bring your baby home and you live day to day with your husband and child or children.)

But, I just wanted to say, I REALLY believe infertility makes those of us who go through it better mothers. We cherish pregnancy so much (not that others don't, but you know what I mean).

I remember throwing up and then thanking God. :) Every moment of pregnancy is a gift and I loved it all so much. Every ache and every pain and every minute.

Motherhood is the same. We enjoy every minute when we think back to the times we thought we couldn't have kids.

Enjoy it all. It is a true gift from God.
Kelly S.

Heather said...

God is good. His timing is perfect, and He is faithful. And, I know you are faithful, too, praying every day for women who are struggling, even the ones you don't know. You are such an encouragement to so many women, Kelly, and I love you!!

Jacquie said...

I don't know exactly how you feel, Kelly, but do know some of what you feel. I was never so happy as when I was pregnant. I knew God had truly blessed me and I didn't even really know HIM yet... that was to come.

What a great encouragement you are to others who have experienced what you've experienced.

I continue to pray for you and Scott as you prepare for this precious, LOVED baby.

Amanda said...

Thank you for praying for all of us who are struggling with TTC and infertility. I cannot even begin to explain how much peace I have with my situation and I KNOW it is because of those, like you, who pray for girls like me every day. Thank you!

The Mrs. said...

I just love your blog to death. I was in the waiting game and now I have my Landon! Now we're gearing up for in vitro again. Congrats to you!!! You are so adorable!!!

Amanda said...

I just saw the PSS about your friend, she is in my prayers!

Kristy said...

Kelly,
Your blog is so wonderful and inspirational! Happy 16th week! This was around the time that I felt tiny kicks, and then pregnancy gets even more amazing.

I got a new blog instead of xanga, and I added your site because it is so great! =) Now it's
hall4one.blogspot.com

Have a great day!

Kelly said...

Kelly,

Thank you so much for posting this. It was something I really needed because it has been such a stuggle lately and at times I feel like there is no hope. But I know with God all things are possible and if its his will it will happen, I just have to keep trusting him. Thank you!

Heather said...

Kelly- thank you for posting this. Infertility is lonely and even when you don't want to doubt God, it is tough to keep believing strongly when the circumstances don't change. Each month is such a vicious cycle, and it just consumes you.
I wish more pregnant people were like you- in many ways! That they would appreciate and love the pregnancy as a gift...and that they would sympathize or emphathize with those of us wanting a baby so badly.
You are a precious example of Christ and I thank Him for you today. I also prayed for your sweet baby!

Flo said...

Your first pregnancy is SO wonderful! Well, they ALL are, but the first one is really special....I know what you mean about 'thinking baby' all day long. It's like a little secret you have with you (until you start showing!) and it's so special when shared. I pray that God gives you an effortless pregnancy (and labor!). Soak it up...it goes by fast!
Flo

The Branches said...

awwwee You are so precious Kelly. Your words are so sweet,kind, and understanding. And it's such a testimony that you have for so many people now! I'm so thankful to know friends like you (even if it is just in blog world!)
*I'll be praying*
Becky

Faith said...

Thank you for this post, and for your prayers. It really does mean so much and encourages me to keep going and not lose hope. God is working even though I may not see it now.

Praying for you and baby H too!

Jenna said...

Kelly, you are a precious, precious person. God is using you like crazy, my friend, and I am blessed to know you!

Jamie said...

You are right - God is so good, His timing is perfect, and I am thankful today for your message and the impact that it is making in so many other's lives.

Anonymous said...

Kelly,

I stalk your blog every now and then and want you to know what an encouragement you are to me. We have given up on getting pregnant (after TTC using EVERYTHING) for 3+ years. We are moving forward with adoption . . I am excited about becoming a mom but still deeply desire to "carry" a child and know what pregnancy feels like. Please add me to your prayer list! I really am hoping
God will take that desire away from me . . it makes things really hard!

KB
Arkansas

Lianna Knight said...

Kelly,

I just can't tell you how much your post meant to me today. It is so hard to share how you feel with those that are closest to you--unless they have experienced infertility. I must say, I have been so successful with every aspect of my life, and to have so many problems with TTC is so mind-boggling. But, all in His time. I do believe this has made me a stronger person and even closer God. I do believe that He hears my prayers and has a plan especially for me.

Thanks...you are truly a blessing.

Amy (Metz) Walker said...

Thanks for being transparent...you are such an encouragement!

Anonymous said...

Oh Kelly,
Your words are such a comfort and inspiration. I so look forward to seeing your posts, you are so full of wisdom and joy.
I do not yet know the joys of pregnancy or motherhood, or the sorrow of infertility. But, I do know the heartache of "waiting". I have yet to find my soul mate and so desire to share my life with a wonderful man. Some days it is just so hard and sad, yet I have to remain focused on the Father and His timing for me.
Bless you today and in the days to come. And, bless of of the wonderful friends on this blog.
E in Texas

Tracy and Andy Yates said...

Kelly,

I came across your blog today, and I love it! My husband and I have been married for almost 4 years and have been trying for a baby almost as long. I am trusting God for His perfect timing. I am excited to try your recipes! Yay! I don't know if you read your comments or not, but please e-mail me if you ever get a chance.

duchess said...

You seem to be blessed with such a gift for this situation that is very uplifting.
I'm dropping you this comment to ask you to add my friend Cortney to your prayer list. They are just starting the IVF process, with the daily shots, etc. They will be doing the egg retrieval around the 13th of Aug. (while in the middle of a relocation).
Thanks, Kelly - a few extra prayers can't hurt.

Honea Household said...

Kelly, I know that your words of encouragement spoke to some today who needed to hear it. You know, I will be honest and tell you that I had no trouble getting pregant, so I don't know the struggle and ache of infertility. However, I do remember the longing for a child and understand that part of it. And I am so glad that you are willing to share your heart with others.

Adventures of Laura said...

You are such an awesome example of how the body of Christ can encourage and lift each other up. I pray that when I do become pregnant I am as positive as you are!

Blessed Be The Name is such an amazing song, but I can always count on tears when we sing it. Choosing to bless God even when times are hard seems like a life- long lesson for me.

Praying for you and your sweet baby!

The Garners said...

Kelly, you have such a gift for encouragement! I know God has already used your struggles (and now your beautiful blessing) in amazing ways!

Lauren said...

Thanks for sharing the Steiner's story that we can pray for them. Keep us updated on baby Jonathan!

I hope you have a nice week!

Cheryl said...

Thank you so much for the encouragement! You are incredibly sweet to stop in all your joy and continue to post about your struggle with infertility and the struggles of other women. Thank you so much for the thoughts and prayers. I will be praying for you, your baby and your family.

Anonymous said...

Kelly thank you for you inspitational words. I needed those today. I had one m/c in Dec. of 07 and am going through one now. It has been so hard but, I have a strong faith and do believe God will give us a baby in his time. But, it is hard and lonely at times..it helps so much to hear from someone who has been through hard times. God bless you and if you have time it would be great to get a personal email so we can chat...jdsw02@yahoo.com

MT

Meredith said...

Very touching post. You have such a big heart for ministering to women in this heartbreaking situation.

Megan L Hutchings said...

Thank you so much for sharing your story! It is a great reminder to those who are waiting NOT to give up AND a great reminder to those of us who have children to NOT take them for granted!!!

I am so happy you are going to be a mommy ;)!

Zoe said...

I LOVE that song too... and it gave me goosebumps this morning when I listened to it. It was so comforting, yet convicting, to me during our long season of infertility and waiting for children.
And now, "when the sun's shining down on me, in land that is plentiful", I just praise God for His amazing goodness!!

Sunni at The Flying Mum said...

So true...NOTHING is impossible with Him! Love this post, and all the neat stories.

And yes, we must get together and eat mexican food. Maybe after all the babies are born!?

The Catons said...

Kelly, just so you know...the PPS on this post...she lost her baby last night. She and her husband need all the prayers we can send them!!!

Anonymous said...

Thanks Kelly for your encouraging words! Sometimes when you're in the middle of it it's easy to forget that there really are people out there who have been through this before! Good luck on your baby!